I keep fighting with myself but I don’t know if I am winning
I keep taking baby steps although I know they’re not within
Everyday I tell that spirit that I leave it all to him
But sometimes I wonder if indeed this journey is for me
You may find me sitting lost in thoughts but that is not the end
I have taken all my troubles and I hold them in my hands
There is not a brick to break except I let them crack my back
This is not the place we started but we’ve come this far to bark
Can you see me fighting with myself
Can you hear me screaming in your ears
Are my words too silent to make a little sense
Are you listening
Are you watching
Are you just passing by?
How do you celebrate life
And mourn death at the same time?
How do you rejoice for a new day
When a loved one goes away?
How do you tell an infant
That he no longer has a mother?
How do you keep loving
When your heart feels so empty?
How do you answer these endless questions
When your mind is stuck in confusion?
You keep fighting as if you’ve got strength
You refuse to admit your weakness
People see your flaws flowing
They think you’re failing.
But I defend you with my many words
Hoping to clear shame from your world
Stop hiding behind the curtains
Come with your stains and stench.
Life still has more stars and moons
Night won’t crush you unless you brood
Watch me take your hand
Let them know I’m your friend.
Often too quickly the new becomes old
A beautiful story is no longer told
The crawling toddler is now a limping aged
The sunrise has soon returned to bed.
By days or moments, we stay locked out
Shielded by something raw and round.
Like a tyrant wielding a rod
Ready to whip one that runs
These rules bend us, break us, belittle us
They tell us the things we can’t want
They remind us of our disabilities
As if humanity shares not one disease.
They are codes, invisible symbols
Crafted into people standing by walls
Staring at you with the corner of their eyes
Ready to drill you till you pay the price
We soon cower under their gaze
Too frightened to try to win the race
So we accept in simple resignation
Our million doses of painful portion.
Your body has set its own alarm
No longer in need of the clock on the wall
Your mind has drafted its own courses
Sharply discarding your to-do list
Withered seconds scream your name silently
Too selfish to let themselves go by untouched
Your feet hurry like the wind, not pausing one moment
To smile at the leaves and trees
Or enjoy the sensual healing of seas.
Can you take a day away
To rest at ease and save your face
Can you kindly forget your name
And your friends all around earth’s space
Can you perform like a mannequin
Without thought of timing anything
Can you take it slow like the snail
Since life loves the liver of it.
Life happens when we stop being afraid to stare our fears in the face
Life happens when we cease trying to answer rhetorical questions
Life happens when we just sink in the wind and fly nonetheless
Life happens when we let love lead and follow faithfully
Life happens when we forget to wear masks to hide our hurts
Life happens when we take each day like a path of grace
Life happens when we suspend all doubts that wear us out
Life happens when we cry even under the rumbling rain
Life happens when we keep our promises not because of gain
Life happens when we decide to win amidst the oddest odds
Life happens when we laugh even if no one understands the mirth
Life happens when we kiss a new moment goodbye with no qualms at heart.
Amidst the harshness of the economy
And the endless plight of the needy
There’s a desperate self-investment
Leaving millions in a cantonment
Lips quiver in unbecoming wailing
Eyes glitter with tears ever filling
Joints and frames lack the grace of life
Or the gaits of satisfied men in time
Doors stay shut, hiding from the single
Ignoring the panic of the unforeseen
Pretending to care about plenty things
All in the name of reckless ambitions
So the lacking become the wanton
And the sated lack knowledge of hospitality.